Thursday, September 13, 2012

brief encounters

These lines are actual specimens. Tried in real life situations. Spectacularly unsuccessful when used on me, but, who knows? Maybe your mileage will vary.

1. Hey, baby, you're just my size.
2. You should let me take you home, darling, and make you a bubble bath.
3. Oh, honey, why you wearing all those clothes? You'd look better without them.
4. I like girls who like big books/complicated books/James Joyce/David Foster Wallace.
5. Are you looking for someone? Because I think I might be him.
6. I like girls who know their Beats. [seriously? have you noticed what decade we're in?]
7. You know what would be amazing? You. Plus, me.
8. I like that color you got on your lips. I think it'd look nice if you shared it with me.
9. What kind of Asian are you? 
10. Hot bunny! Look at your tail!

Most effective line in my experience?

Hi.

1 comment:

Ali Trotta said...

Oh, wow. These made me laugh. Once, I got Hiiii, accompanied by Ross-style finger guns. I just about DIED.